Monday 1 September 2014

Writing (Adding Detail).

Rimu heard a voice saying Rimu. He heard something tap on the window. Rimu rolled over. He still felt sleepy. He couldn’t figure out why he could hear his name. He didn’t think it could be hail because it was the middle of summer.
He sat up, and looked. It was early morning. He could just make out a shadow, which leant forward and rapped again, louder this time.
“Rimu! You deadhead. Wake up!”
Rimu groaned. Ollie! He would have preferred hail.


Changed in This Below!


As Rimu was sleeping in bed, suddenly a voice started saying “Rimu, Rimu.” Something on the window started taping. Then Rimu rolled out of bed. His is strength was very weak because he still felt sleepy. He couldn’t figure out why he his ears are listening to his name being called in the middle of his sleep. Doubts started appearing in his mind and thinking it could be hail but, why would it because it was the middle of summer.

His eyes open and looked out the window, it was early in the morning. He could just make out a shadow, which leant forward and rapped again, but louder this time.
“Rimu! You deadhead. Wake up!”
He groaned, Ollie!  Rimu would have preferred hail instead.

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